Sunday, 31 August 2008

Wet dance party in the Wardroom


I am here in Halifax! And moved in! Into res! With people!

*looks around*

Well, there are people around. Somewhere. I think.

I have been hella busy since arriving, as you can imagine. Setting up a room takes more time than you think -- I understand just a little more everyone who has been moving this summer. Of course mine was on a much smaller scale, but now it is so PRETTY. I wish I could show you pictures, but the internet here hates most of us and it's shitty and I have to wait until Tuesday, but my room is PRETTY. I am accepting the 1.5 feet of hanging space (compared to 5 feet on all the other floors of my building) and the tiny dimensions of my room and the lack of space for my posters because one thing reconciles all of this: my beautiful, beautiful window seat. That's right, I have the biggest windows sill which I can sit on, on pretty cushions I got, and do my reading. Have I started any of this reading? No. It's frosh week, what do you expect.

The full story of my move in is long and mostly boring. There were some tears from my mother and I, but everything is feeling ok now. All Saturday morning we stood in lines, unpacked boxes, were given many Thing We Can't Lose and carried an amazing amount of papers and fliers. Then I joined Frosh, Purgatory style. So far I've heard a good concert, had a pizza party, got soaked in a thunder storm during Quad Olympics and made friends with more leaders than Frosh. But I'm sure that'll change; I'm hoping people stop acting fake so we can be friends. I understand the whole "wanting to be cool thing", so I'll have to wait.

Tonight is movie night on the Quad and a ghost walk. I'll post pictures of various things as soon as I call the guy on Tuesday and then he comes and fixes my internet. Grr.

Wednesday, 27 August 2008


Today, my day will be occupied by something called "packing". I believe this means I'll pull out everything I own, go through it, and put it into bags. I can't be sure. At this point, I'm hoping if I ignore it, it'll go away. No? Bad plan?

Half my clothes are packed. My bags and coats and boots are in a pile in the front room. miscellaneous STUFF is all over the place.

Me: So what I'm wondering is how I ended up with so much STUFF and how it's all fitting A) into the car to drive and B) into my room. How did this happen? Where did it all come from? WHY DO I NEED IT?

Andrea: Oh, I have done that. My advice? PURGE. PURGE LIKE YOU'VE NEVER PURGED BEFORE.

Apparently, we are fully schooled in the ways of caps lock.

So today is my last day! Which is exciting, but also inconvenient because now suddenly there are all these people to see, but, I also thought Wednesday would be the best day of packing too. It's ok; if I chant "I do believe in fairies" and click my heels together three times I'm pretty sure my Fairy Godmother will show up and do everything for me. I'll get right on that.

Monday, 25 August 2008

Note to self


Take a deep breath. People are leaving; this is scary. However, you've been doing a pretty good job of keeping it together, and this is commendable, but it's important to continue over the next couple days. Just remember to keep breathing and keep repeating "It's ok. You can do this."

Be excited. Be psyched. Remember the feeling of each moment.

The warning, musical, the hour, irrevocable.

Take the plunge!

Wednesday, 20 August 2008

Things to miss #1

Sometime, I underestimate how lucky I am to live by the canal. My walk home from downtown is a beautiful stroll that smells like nature. Whenever I have friends visit from out of town, I make sure to give them a canal tour, and they're always shocked that this is in the middle of the city. Luckily, there's lots of water in Halifax (duh), but I will miss my canal walks.

Today's post brought to you by the letter "gar"

I'm sleepy.

And guilty-feeling.

And stressed.

And scared.

And alone. I am so bad at being alone. Why does growing up mean learning how to be alone?

Monday, 18 August 2008

quote, "EW"

Oh my god, Oh my god, I just pulled a huge hair out of my eye. GROSS. I spent all feeling like there was something on my eye and there was. A huge hair. I just measured it, it was 5 cm long. And now my eye is all bloodshot and sore from sticking my finger in it repeatedly.

Giving my moral support about my eye was a close friend Kirsten. Due to shitty family circumstances and close proximity, Kirsten became the third daughter of our family. She's been following her own path which has led her a little further from us than before. She put dreads in her hair and moved out with some friends last year. Now she's gone to live in Montreal and go to design school and I said goodbye to her today. In all likelihood, I won't see her until next summer, and I'll miss her, even though she drives me insane. Who else will come into my work yelling "Evey! I NEED pants!"

Brace for impact

As time runs short, things start to change. My sister and I pick more fights. My mother's voice goes up a couple decibels to maintain a chirpy, cheerful tone. My dad keeps repeating "I don't want her to go yet" when he thinks I can't hear him. My cats, my sweet, warm, wonderful cats seem just that much cuter and sweeter and impossible to leave. Every moment seems longer, and shorter and sometimes it gets really hard not to cry, but my mom and I have an understanding. If we each cry alone, we can both pretend it isn't happening. We can both be fine. It doesn't count if we don't see it.

"You have to promise me," she keeps saying with a voice that hopes for humour, "that when I leave you don't give me that look that makes me want to come back and bring you home."

Move-in is at 10am on August 30th, and Frosh starts at 1pm. "What if I need time?" Davis asked me the other day, "I need time. I want a day to be sad and cry and miss my home. After that I can go to frosh, but I want time. To mourn."

Every day is a roller coaster, highs and lows. One moment I can't wait, I feel confident in the changing relationship with my mother, I'm excited for a new place, I'm itching for freedom. A few minutes later, I feel scared and alone and I want my mommy. I want to curl up in bed and stay there where it's safe.

Tuesday, 12 August 2008

Happy days are here again

I stand in front of the closet, with a hand on one hip. Behind me lie all of the pants that, five minutes earlier, sat in the closet. The shorts, the first victims, are crumpled underneath the heavier cold-weather corduroys. On the top lie many versions of my classic staple: the blue jean. Straight-leg, boot-cut, acid-washed, different sizes. After trying them all on, I am pondering the eternal problem: closet full of jeans, nothing to make my butt look good.

For the past couple weeks I have had some serious body frustration going on, and my pants are the problem. Having misplaced my stretchy under-skirt shorts, I can't comfortably wear my skirts and dresses, so I was left with pants which, you got it, just aren't fitting the way I wanted to. There is something truly shitty about starting your day hating the way your butt looks.

Until today -- success! My fancy, on-sale designer jeans I bought in Halifax returned from their disappearance just in time to boost my self-esteem. So I stood in front of the closet, pulled on the prodigal jeans and checked my ass in the mirror.

It's going to be a good day.

Monday, 11 August 2008

Last Supper

Last night was The Last Supper. Kevin invited over the LCI grads, all our friends, on the last day when we would all be in town together. A potluck feast was organised with massive contributions of fried rice and spring rolls from Kevin's mother. It was delicious.

I was incredibly nervous for The Last Supper, in that way that only a gathering of my high school peers can make me nervous. I made my salad, I put on my new sweater and I missioned out to Hunt Club.

Everything got off to a good start -- even Jake gave me a hug and told me he's missed me. I really enjoyed seeing everyone and catching up, but as dinner ended and people broke into groups, I couldn't help but feel like the same old story over again. I didn't have a place, I didn't belong there. That had the unfortunate consequence of making things worse by making me more uptight. Sometimes I suspect that if I could just chill out, it would be easier to fit.

I am even more psyched for King's now. I'm ready to try a new place, meet new people. A new situation.

Thursday, 7 August 2008

A fancy kind of day

Wow, is it ever raining. It's like the rain is making up for the rest of the day when it wasn't raining.

I spent today enjoying the lack of rain in Westboro. It was a little gross with the heat and the dust from all the construction on Wellington, but I enjoyed some quality sister bonding time nonetheless.

We ended up bargain hunting -- my sister bought two books for 99 cents each outside Collected Works, and I bought plates, bowls, glasses and wine glasses at St Vincent de Paul. Did I mention I LOVE charity shops? A lot. I also bought a charming children's book about "Discovering Nova Scotia". And it's a colouring book! Davis and I have already decided see all the sights in the book.

After braving the dust and heat, we headed for lunch at the restaurant where Davis works, which was delicious. I had fancy pizza and fancy mushroom salad. Then Davis and I went and inaugurated her fancy new Visa card by buying a fancy new hair straightener for a fancy low sale price. Look! Photographic evidence.

Tuesday, 5 August 2008

A couple of days ago I got an envelope from King's. I love getting mail, so I got really, really excited. It was a big envelope, nice and thick. It arrived just as I was running out the door to work, so I had all day to think about it. Was it about residence? Was it boring paperwork? Had I already messed something up already without knowing it?

Turns out it was none of those things. Instead, when I opened the envelope, I found Orientation Week info! Yay! The extreme nerdy nature of my O-Week quickly became apparent when I opened the booklet and found out the theme of O-Week (a week of Orientation, not Initiation!) is Dante's the Divine Comedy. We start in Purgatory! King's is very excited about The Divine Comedy, what with it being its 700th anniversary this year. I am going to the coolest, nerdiest school!

22 days left...

Wow. That is scary. That's... that's nothing. I don't know if I'm ready for this.

Friday, 1 August 2008

Drawer Reassignment

Yesterday I took some time off of my busy chores-work-sleep schedule to go through my closet. REALLY go through. I've been going a little shopping crazy, what with finding great consignment stores in Indiana and the store where I work having its 70% off sale... Things were getting a little tight in the closet. So now everything is tidy, organized and I even rediscovered old shirts that I totally forgot I had and are very cute.

My only remaining problem is jeans. I have way too many pairs of jeans, but the problem is, I don't have my favourites. My favourite jeans are all worn out and ripped up and until I find their replacement... I have a bunch of random pairs I bought on sale which are nice, but are really just taking up room. This is my Saturday mission: jeans shopping. Wish me luck.

Meanwhile, today's mission is to get through my very long to-do list. It's now August; I need to get started on my book list for next year. Anyone have an extra copy of the Epic Of Gilgamesh lying around?